Harry and Jad had planned the whole thing together. The surprise washed away all my doubts and fears. I was back on cloud nine. I was back to being the happiest person on earth. I was back to the cardboard castle I’d built in the air.
He got me a rose and a teddy bear soaked in his Valentino perfume. I kept the rose inside my favorite poetry book – yes, when it came to love, I was the cheesiest. I hugged the teddy bear every night when I went to sleep.
Another four weeks of bliss pass by, and I was climbing higher and higher into the sky, discovering new realms, new worlds, and attempting to top every peak, and glide on every cloud.
My best friend’s birthday was a couple of days away, and I began to plan a surprise for him. I talked to 10 of our friends, and told them I would be renting a chalet in Faraya, where we would be spending the night celebrating Jad’s birthday.
I talked to Harry, and told him I’d reserved one room for Jad and our friends, and a separate room for us. I wanted to finally share my bed with him. I wanted to finally make love to him. He smiled at my suggestion, and my heart skipped a beat. And so love waited in Faraya.
We were to be handed our room by 6:00 pm. Harry and I decided to spend the whole day together. I took a bus from Beirut to Jeita, where he picked me up. It was raining.
I got into the car and kissed him, excited that the day where Harry and I would spend more than 24 hours together had come. Tonight was the night I would finally make love to him.
We went to his house; it was empty. We started making out, but we did not make love, because love was to be poured into each other’s beings that night, and because love waited in Faraya…
But for a second, while we were kissing, I felt that his kisses were not the same that day. His lips were dry.
His touch was not the same; his hands were loose.
I hugged him, but his embrace was not as warm. I looked into his eyes, those beautiful shining eyes, but they’d lost their sparkle, and he looked away.
I hid my inquietude, and I kissed his icy cold lips.
I was hungry, hungrier than ever before. We got into his car and went to the nearest Wooden Bakery and had breakfast. He ate silently, and I watched his every move. My heart told me things I wished not to believe.
“What do we do now?” I asked him.
“Let’s go to Jounieh. The weather is better now so we can take a walk until we figure out what to do,” he replied.
We passed by his best friend’s house in Jounieh to say hello. Then we walked to a deserted park in the city. We were alone, except for a couple of guys in the distance.
Harry and I walked and talked of different topics from Britney Spears and Lady Gaga to global warming and the tsunamis. I talked of my university, and he talked of his.
He talked about how exhausting it was becoming, and how deeply in love with directing movies he was. He talked about his grades being the best ever achieved. He talked about the projects he’d been working on. Then he hesitantly mentioned the fact that he’d applied to a scholarship in California a couple of months ago.
“Wait a second,” I interrupted him. “What do you mean you’ve applied to a scholarship in California? Why haven’t you mentioned this before?”
“Well… I never thought I would ever be accepted.” His voice was shaking.
“And… Umm… Now you mention it because?” My pulse increased.
He sighed deeply, with tears in his eyes, and looked away…
[…to be continued]